What I Should Have Said to Vanessa Williams — Beth Collier Communication, Creativity & Leadership Strategist

I’d love to say I was effortlessly cool I was when I met her. But I can’t…

“Who’s someone you admire that people might be surprised by?”

It’s the kind of question I usually stumble over. But when I was asked this question in July, I had an answer ready.

I had just written an article about her, in fact.

“Vanessa Williams,” I said.

Most people know Vanessa Williams as an accomplished singer, actress – and a stunningly beautiful woman.

But those aren’t the reasons I admire her.

I admire her resilience.

I’m just old enough to remember when Williams became the first Black woman crowned Miss America.

I also remember the scandal that followed: nude photos of her, sold by a so-called friend, forced her to resign her crown.

It was a dramatic fall — followed by an even more remarkable comeback.

In the 1990s, Williams came on my radar when I sang along with her songs on the radio.

I remembered bits of the scandal from the 1980s, and thought how remarkable it was that she’d rebuilt her career with sheer talent.

When I saw her in interviews, she carried herself with such poise and grace.

She was someone who epitomized class.

Later, when I read You Have No Idea, the memoir she wrote with her mother, my admiration deepened.

I hadn’t realized the full extent of the betrayal, the racism, or the weight of public scrutiny she faced at such a young age.

Like the title promised, I had no idea.

Learning what she endured made her success all the more inspiring.

It was through her book that I discovered Williams hadn’t even set out to be Miss America; she entered the pageant to earn money so she could study musical theatre in England.

In fact, as the Miss America crown was being placed on her head, Williams wasn’t thinking about fame or success the title might bring her.

Instead she wrote:

“There goes my junior year abroad in London.”

So when I heard she was starring in the London stage production of The Devil Wears Prada, I felt happy for her – that decades later she was getting her chance to “study abroad” in London.

I decided to take my 11-year-old daughter to see the show – even though she hadn’t seen the movie and didn’t know who Vanessa Williams was.

On the way, I told her:

“You’ll see right away how beautiful she is. Then you’ll hear how well she can sing.

“But what I really admire about Vanessa Williams is how brave she is.

“She had really difficult things happen to her when she was young – but she never gave up.

“She believed in herself – and she succeeded.”

After the show, my daughter asked if any of the actors would appear outside (like we experienced after a Broadway show in New York City last year).

“I don’t know,” I told her. “But we can go see.”

We found our way to the stage door, and there was Vanessa Williams – signing programs for a group of fans that were gathered.

It looked like she was wrapping up, so I nudged my daughter forward with a branded notebook we had just purchased from the theatre’s gift shop.

As my daughter handed over her notebook, I thought, ‘This is it — your chance to tell Vanessa Williams how much you admire her. Maybe mention her book, or how much you respect her tenacity.’

But how could I convey that without sounding awkward or overeager?

I opened my mouth – but before I could speak, Vanessa turned to my daughter and asked:

“Is that Kate with a K or a C?”

She couldn’t have known this, but I had just written about the importance of names – how getting them right is a small (but meaningful) sign of respect.

And here she was, showing that care and respect to my child.

I was touched.

I snapped a few photos as Williams signed, capturing my daughter’s wide-eyed excitement.

I managed to say “thank you” through a huge grin and was ready to step aside when Williams stopped me.

“Pictures! We need to get a picture!” she said.

I fumbled with my phone, juggling a water bottle and show program, until a kind theatre employee offered to take the photo for us.

And just like that, I had proof we’d met Vanessa Williams – a photo capturing the day I met someone I admired, and a reminder that sometimes the real person is even better than the one you imagine.

My smile does not accurately convey how enthusiastic I was feeling

I managed again to say thank you again – but what I wish I had conveyed was that my gratitude went far beyond a photo or an autograph.

I was thanking Vanessa for the example she had given me as a young woman: one of resilience, perseverance, and class.

And, I would have saved the best for last and said:

“I hope your time in London is everything you dreamed it would be – and more.”